Masks and shopping bags

Ah and anyway a few days ago i tried shopping alone haha the first time actually, and it was a pretty pleasant experience i would say , like you're totally in your own world and the music makes you sub conscious to the environment ( which explains why i kept stepping onto ppl's shoes that day ) , where you just let something pretty catch your eye, if only we can all feel better when we buy stuffs, but the happiness is just temporay, i wouldn't even call it happiness, happiness is too great a word to be used in such a case?I would say it's just the sense of fufillment that you got something pretty , something nice that subsitutes what you might call happiness, when you purchase something that has caught your eye


i guess sometimes the reason why i would look at stuffs online, have the urge to spend maybe it's just to make me feel less empty like there's nothing much exciting going on in my life and seriously looking at clothes online, looking at those fashiony stuffs ( watching movies etcetc) make me feel like i've more of a life? Like more in touch with something that's happening outside of my little bubble , and yeah to feel better about myself, i mean dressing well does boost one's self confidence, i wouldn't say by leaps and bounds, but at least it's kinda acts like a mask sometimes to hide your physical/psychological insecurities about yourself. Like you'll avoid wearing horizontal stripes cause you think you'll look fat etcetc , or psychologically where you'll feel " cooler" or better about yourself knowing that you're dressing well instead of looking damn obiang or whatsoever.

It's damn hard, or nearly impossible to not be superficial sometimes.